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I'm trying not to hope too much and to pay attention to each step along the way instead of thinking about the outcome. Obviously, a happy, healthy baby is the desired result, but that would be too much hoping. I'm not decorating a nursery or telling lots of family and friends. The next step is vacation from work next week and a drive to the fertility clinic.

I expect my family and friends to be happy for me. I've got a safe, supportive, nurturing group. There will be surprises. Not everyone deals well with changing situations. Overall though, I expect my parents to be happy for all of us. It's still too soon to start hoping. Dealing with their disappointment would be as hard as dealing with mine.

The intake paperwork for the doctor needs to be completed. I'm working on that this morning. The intake has so many questions about the father, the sperm and how long unprotected sex has not resulted in pregnancy. But I try to be a good girl and follow the rules. I've never had unprotected sex. I've never had a pregnancy scare. Should I worry? Does it mean anything? Is it time to start thinking about sperm bank selection?